Marriage is fun; marriage is sweet. But marriage is complex
and it is not a place where “as you lay your bed so you lie on it”
Indeed many couples find this to be true in their
relationship. Sometimes, for husbands, wives can be downright confusing. One night, a husband looks at his wife with
puppy dog eyes and suggests romance. She
replies in frustration, “Not tonight. Is
sex all you men think about?” A few
nights later in that very same bed, she might say, “You just watch TV and go to
bed. Don’t you find me attractive
anymore?”
Another husband hears his wife complaining about her need to
exercise. He buys her a great gifts. And
that’s when the fight begins!
There are countless times in marriage when a husband and
wife get their wires crossed. No wonder
men are confused about how to make their wife happy! Efforts to make your wife
happy may seem to backfire more often than not.
Although the mystery between men and women is sure to
continue, here are ten proven activities to make your wife happy:
1. Make talk
time a daily habit. Don’t allow yourself
to become so busy that you can’t spend 15 minutes a day talking with your
wife. By the way, the last 15 minutes of
your day when you’re utterly exhausted don’t count.
If possible, use dinnertime as a place for
conversation. If dinner doesn’t work,
maybe it’s a five minute phone call at lunch and 10 minutes sitting on the sofa
in the evening.
2. Act
interested in what your wife has to say.
Notice I wrote “act.” I know the
things we wives talk about can be boring, long-winded, dramatic or illogical
(or all of the above). But if you simply
act as if you care about what we’re saying, it means the world to us.
Just picture yourself in a board room listening to a boring
presentation by your boss. You would
still act interested out of respect for your boss. Act interested in your wife’s comments, not
always because the conversation is riveting, but because you love your
wife.
3. Hug,
cuddle, and kiss throughout the day.
Remember the affectionate way you would hold her hand, put your arms
around her waist, and kiss her softly while you were engaged? Do that again and again. Remind yourself to romance and court her
physically with a steady flow of affection.
But remember, the goal of all your hugging and cuddling
isn’t to have sex that night. It’s
simply to be physically close (which will naturally lead to more sex throughout
the week).
4. Write her
a love note. It doesn’t have to be pure
poetry to make her heart flutter. Write
down the things you appreciate about her.
Why are you glad you married her?
Did she do something last week that you really liked? How is she doing a good job as a mother?
5. Take her
on a coffee date. Let her know you want
to hear all the details of her day over a nice, hot cup of coffee. If you have younger children, arrange for
someone to watch the kids for an hour or two.
On the date, hold her hand, open the door for her, and brag about her to
the barista.
6. Tell her
she looks beautiful. What’s a common
question that little girls ask? Do I
look beautiful daddy? It’s a question
that grown women still wonder about.
Women tend to be hard
on themselves regarding their looks. We
are afraid we don’t measure up in your sight.
But if you look into your wife’s eyes and tell her she is beautiful, you
will make her day!
7. Help with
the household duties. If you want to
make your wife mad, say something like “Oh, I see you’re doing your annual
vacuuming” (I know this from personal experience). But if you pick up around the house, help in
the kitchen, and yes even vacuum without being asked, your wife will be
incredibly thankful.
8. Notice
what she worries about and reassure her.
Your wife is a security seeker.
Maybe she’s worried about an upcoming move, a child’s development, or
financial pressures. Strengthen yourself
first in the Lord so you can then encourage your wife. Hold her and reassure her often that
everything is going to be okay.
9. Bring her
an unexpected gift. Most women love
gifts and it doesn’t really matter whether they come in small or big
packages. Surprise her with a
just-because bouquet of flowers or box of chocolates. Maybe she’s compiling a wish list online of
things she wants. Take a peek and
surprise her with one item from her list.
10. Open up to
her about yourself. The strong, silent
type works in the movies, but not in real life.
Your wife wants to hear about your life.
She wants to know what is making you happy and what is stressing you
out.
This is how she connects with you. She actually cares about what you had for
lunch and the strange thing you saw on the way home. Don’t reply to your wife’s questions with one
word answers. Elaborate.
Which of these activities do you think your wife would
enjoy? If you’re not sure, you can
always ask her. She’ll love that you
were reading an article about how to make her happy!
