3 Words That May Be Missing or Not Used Enough In Your Marriage

One of the strongest things that bring peace and joy to a marriage is good and meaningful, communication. 

There would always be issues in marriage, but murmuring and sighs don’t really bring out the best in couples. 

Good here simply means not initiating the conversation when we think our spouses are wrong, but we also need a willingness to admit when we know we are the one who is wrong.

How often do you offer your spouse the benefit of the doubt? This can go a long way in overcoming conflicts that come up in your relationship.

The next time you find yourself all charged for a “fight” with your spouse or ready to give them a piece of your mind, take a time out and hold up a white flag while you speak these three words to your spouse.

Please forgive me: 

Sound weird? What about those other three words, like, “I love you,” or the more obvious word choice when you’re in an argument, “I’m sorry”?

Those phrases are useful, but they’re not always used sincerely. 

“I’m so sorry” and “I love you” can quickly deteriorate into “Sorry” sarcasm, and “Love you” scorn, with maybe even an eye-roll thrown in for good measure.

But when we intentionally ask our spouses to forgive us, we do a couple of important things simultaneously. 

1.         We recognize are we also at fault in the current argument or conflict.

Whether you feel you’re in the wrong or not, if you’ve exchanged harsh words or offered an ugly attitude over whatever you’re arguing about, you have a part you can apologize for and ask to be forgiven for. 

Yes, there is always something you could have handled better.

2.         We draw our spouses closer to us instead of pushing them further away. 

“Please forgive me” creates an invitation, a moment, where defensiveness can soften, and for an opportunity to choose love over resentment to be taken. 

Suddenly, instead of focusing on winning the argument, we’re focusing on each other and how we can both move back to common ground.

If you find yourself frequently looking for and holding onto little things your spouse does that hurts your feelings or causes growing dislike or bitterness, it may be time to do a heart reset. Change!