Children always seem to find a
way to 'push our buttons' at times and really try our patience. It's easy to feel irritated, sad, angry,
annoyed, confused and hurt. It's at these times when our parenting skills are
really tested, and that it's imperative we maintain a kind but firm stance when
it comes to doling out the discipline.
And let's face it - none of us
ever want to hurt our child with physical or verbal abuse. We want to teach our children that such
things are wrong, and punishing a misdeed or inappropriate action by yelling or
hitting is hypocritical at best.
Our goal when disciplining our
children is to teach them to be responsible, cooperative, kind and
respectful. The best way to teach this
is to always remain consistent, follow through with the same punishment for the
same misdeed, and to discuss the discipline with your child openly and honestly
afterwards.
Always keep in mind that the age,
maturity level, and temperament of your child should always be considered when
enforcing a set disciplinary action. Disciplinary actions should be discussed
and understood in advance so that children know what they have coming when
they've misbehaved and can give pause and hopefully choose an appropriate route
to avoid it.
And most importantly, remember
that it's not the child you dislike; it's his or her chosen behavior, action or
misdeed.
If you need to, give yourself a
brief 'time out' before responding with appropriate discipline. Sometimes we need
a short cooling off period before dealing with our children's misdeeds in order
to avoid a misdeed of our own. Yelling and hitting should never be an
option.
Keep an open mind as a parent,
and be willing to learn with and from your child. We all make mistakes and it's
important to realize that not every form of discipline works with every child.
Children are just as unique as adults are, and forms of discipline should be
tailored to fit the individual needs of both parent and child.
But with a little forethought,
patience, firmness, love and understanding, the discipline can have a positive
outcome for all involved.
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