Tuesday 4 November 2014

4 Things You Can Do To Help Save A Hard Marriage




1.         Be Honest With Yourself
What is the true state of your marriage? Is there unfaithfulness, lying, addiction or abuse, on either of your parts?
§    How often do you fight? How do the fights end?
§    When was the last time you had sex?
§    What hang-over follow you around each day?
§    How is your walk with God?
§    How is your husband’s? Would people be shocked at the true state of your relationship if they could really see what goes on behind closed doors?
Basically, take a marriage record. Even if it’s painful to see it in black and white, write it all down. Don’t pretend.

2.         Be Honest With God
You may be displeased with God and avoid seeking Him because you feel like He hasn’t come through for you or that He stopped listening to your prayers. Yes, we sometimes get to that point.
But God knows your heart better than you do. He knows your spouse better than you do. He wants what’s best for both of you. He wants you both to be whole. So lay it all out before Him once and for all.

3.         Be Honest To Share With Someone, Be It A Pastor, Counselor, Etc
This may be hard for some people to do, because for some of us are good at pretending and are masters at faking peaceful homes. Some isolate themselves, and even though they are married, they are actually partner-less. 

If this is you, look around your life and take stock of people who you can trust with your heart, then share it. Choose wisely. 

You must realize that in a normal marriage, couples may experience occasional frictions and little bumps, twists and setbacks. But in a “hard marriage” pain and suffering is a daily affair. You need to find someone who knows the difference and will address your unique situation
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4.         Be Honest With Your Spouse
This may not easy and perhaps it might be the most challenging thing you would do to save your home depending on the variables in your relationship.

Go ahead and do the things that will make your spouse happy. As a husband, buy her a special dress, shoe, or something you know she cherishes. As a wife, make your husband his favorite dinners. Sure, keep ironing his shirts. These are nothing new, but are necessary aspect marriage.

Your situation is different. Your goal is to win your spouse back and save your home. It calls for doing things differently. Yes, it is time for a different list, different from the daily usual routine.  Note that your marriage needs to be handled carefully. And lastly, pray for each other and for your marriage.

2 comments:

  1. its great to read your post. but what do you do when you have done everything here but ur wife refuse to change? my wife is so stubborn and does not even listen her parents or pastor. somehow i have resigned to fate that she's a cross i must bear!

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  2. Prayers is one of the keys that would make any marriage work. I believe couples who prayer together stick together

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