"I Don't Control My Husband.."

Popular comedienne, Anita Asuoha, aka Real Warri Pikin, has opened up on the challenges she faces being a public figure.

Real Warri Pikin and husband, Ikechukwu

She disclosed that people often insinuate that she controls her husband because of the support he gives her.

Speaking with Saturday Beats, Anita said, “They say I am controlling Ikechukwu. They should leave my husband for me. Once a marriage is happy, people will say the husband is a ‘mumu’ (fool), and that the woman is controlling the husband. I hear that a lot of times.”

Noting that her husband and children completely support her brand, she said, “My husband and my children support me a hundred per cent. If my husband does not support me, I would not grow. Seeing that it is what makes me happy, he supports me.”

Regarding those who give her unsolicited advice about her marriage, she said, “If the person is older, I would just say ‘thank you’. But, I would go ahead to do whatever I want to do that I know is right. But if they are younger, I might insult them. If a man wants to be part of his children’s life, let him. It mustn’t be the woman’s responsibility alone.”

The comedienne, who made a social media post during the week referring to some married women as single mothers, emphasised what she meant. “Many married women are single mothers because they are left to take care of the children alone with little or no support from their husbands,” she said.

Proffering suggestions on how women can get their husbands to help them, she said, “Women should stop being enablers. If your husband does not support you with chores and childcare, or if he used to support you and stopped, especially if the two of you are both working, you need to communicate with him about it. Two people are working but only one person comes back to do the chores; that is wickedness. If you are a housewife, that is an entirely different situation.”

The Six Greatest Needs of Husbands in 2016

As the New Year begins, many couples are hoping to enjoy the best of times in their marriages. But as a wife, your ability to understand the needs of your partner would largely help to make your home enjoyable.

Here are 6 of the greatest needs of a man:

1.         Respect

This is number one! I would even be emphatic and say every time. Men want to know that they are respected by their wives above every other person.

Most if not every man feels this internal pressure to excel. And there is at least one place in the lives of men where they want to be successful – at home. If men can’t feel that respect in their home, they will find it somewhere else.

Ladies, you want your husband to love you unconditionally. Are you willing to respect him unconditionally? You probably aren’t always extremely “lovable.” He’s probably not always respectable. 

Do you want to be loved any less when you aren’t at your “best”? Neither does he in the area of respect.

2.         Admiration

Men want to be desirable to their wives. That’s physically, but in other ways too. Is your man strong enough - masculine enough for you? Does he meet all your expectations in a man? 

If a wife openly talks about the sexuality or athletic features of other men of if she repeatedly talks about more successful men in the world, the husband certainly will not feel admired. 

As an example, if a family struggles financially and the wife complains about it all the time, the man hears that as “I’m not good enough.” 

The greatest assurance a man can receive that he got “what it takes” comes from his wife. Remember, men who don’t sense this will often quit trying.

3.         Peace and Tranquility

What plans do you have to make your home in 2016 a place of peace, a place your man and family can prepare for the world?

It is time to understand that nagging never accomplishes what the wife hopes it will. It may get done what you wanted done, but not with the heart or attitude you hoped to go with the action. 

Ladies, is your home a place of peace and tranquility? Someone said the wife/mother is the thermostat of the home? If that’s true, how comfortable are we living?

4.         Commitment

It is a year to renew commitment. Yes, men want this too! They want to know they are number one with you. 

Men don’t want to see their wife looking at other men or hear them commenting on how wonderful another man may be. They want to know you are faithful only to them. Men have shallow and fragile egos?

Ladies, does your husband know he’s number one to you - that no man could ever take his place? Make him sense that in 2016.

5.         Acceptance / Involvement

Husbands aren’t really looking for a wife who will try to change them. Of course, many men need changing; but the best way is through patience, love, prayer and changing your attitude too.

Men want their wives to appreciate their hobbies and interests. Don’t expect to change your man from being a fan of EPL to a fan of rugby or Legend of the Seeker. Join in his hobbies and enjoy the fun together. Sooner, he would drift to yours too.

6.         Freedom to lead

Most men want to lead in their home, but don’t really know how. The wife should allow her husband to make some mistakes and not criticize him always just because she is more competent at a task than he is.

Applaud what your man does right and see him try harder to please you. 

As a wife, are you allowing your husband to sense your satisfaction in his abilities to lead? If you want him to lead, ask yourself, are you willing to follow if he does?

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Celine Dion Praying For Miracle For Husband, René Angélil Battling Throat Cancer

It is said that a family that prays together sticks together. This is what popular singer Celine Dion seems to be teaching the world. Her amazing song says, her heart will go on, and reportedly the Canadian chanteuse is quietly praying that Rene Angelil's does as well -- for a little while longer.

Reports say Celine is holding out for a miracle for her cancer-stricken husband but fears this may be the last holiday they spend together as a family.

According to a Closer Weekly celebrity news featured report, one of Celine Dion's close companions says the singer is desperately trying to enjoy what may be last precious moments with her husband, and she pledges to cherish each passing minute.

"This is very likely the last Christmas they'll celebrate with Rene. Celine is trying to make the most of whatever time they have left with Rene."

Angélil, 73, is reportedly battling a third occurrence of throat cancer. In a recent interview, Celine said a feeding tube has nourished the ailing music manager for the last two years as he struggles to beat the insidious disease.

A week ago, Dion sat down with GMA co-hosts. Then, she said Rene is "doing great" and is "stable." However, doctors are unsure about his chances of recovery or another remission.

Last year, Celine Dion's husband relinquished his role as her longtime manager after surgeons removed a malignant tumor from this throat. Shortly after that, Dion put her Las Vegas residency at Caesars Palace on hold for a year.

Dion returned to the stage in August to raving fans. She said it was part of fulfilling her husband's wish that she do what she does best. In another interview, this time with USA Today, Celine said her husband wants to pass away in her arms when the moment comes.

Celine Dion's recent vocal performance in the wake of the Paris terror attacks moved many to tears at the American Music Awards. According to Hollyscoop, her emotions were twofold: on the one hand, she mourned victims and survivors of the French tragedy; on another, she privately professed love for her beloved husband.

Americans are in the midst of the holiday season, a time full of miracles in every form and fashion. We continue our prayers for Celine and her family that Rene and others stricken with cancer and dreaded disease receive marvels of health and comfort.

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Six Ways to Love Your Husband

It is been said that marriage without love is immoral, and no marriage can truly stand where love is absent. But how do you love your husband in the face of some many issues that come up in a marriage relationship?

Here are six way to show love to your husband in spite of who he is:

1.            With forgiveness

When it comes to “big things”, I think we all know that we are supposed to forgive our husbands. But little things aren’t always looked at in the same light.

When Hubby is late for dinner, I get miffed. When Hubby plays his XBox game for an hour instead of cuddling with me, I’m insulted. When Hubby responds with a biting remark, I’m upset.

It’s these little things that get under our skin. It’s when these little things are done or said, that bother us. And we think that we should “show him” by acting coldly and aloof. We punish him because we think this will help him to learn and NOT do it in the future.

Sometimes I think it’s okay to let Hubby suffer while I refuse to forgive him. I think that while he knows I am upset, he will think twice about his actions next time!

But is this right behavior? Is this what love truly is? 

“Charity (or love) suffers long…” This Bible verse tells me that I am to be l-o-n-g in spirit. A study of those words would show that suffering long or patient doesn’t just stop there. It means to not lose heart, to be slow of anger and punishment. It means to be patient in bearing the offenses of others.

That gives no room for letting Hubby suffer while I harbor bitterness against him.

Forgiveness looks like:

•             Acting as if Hubby didn’t do _____.

•             Showing kindness when Hubby has done ____.

•             Intentionally showing love when Hubby has intentionally done something to hurt.

2.            With patience

I see things that aren’t good and should be changed in Hubby’s life. But I can’t change him – only God can. I must be patient for him to learn and let God work.

Do you know how difficult that is for a woman?!? Many women get married thinking they can change their husbands. And they soon realize that their nagging won’t get anywhere!

“Charity suffereth long…” begins the list of those things that love embodies. I’ve always thought that this phrase simply meant patient, but it’s not just that!

In my marriage, I’m supposed to have a long spirit or temper. I must persevere patiently. I must be slow to anger and slow to punish. I must be patient in bearing the offenses of hubby.

Hubby and I are going to have disagreements.  Sometimes we may argue and fight about something. It’s just a “given” because we are two imperfect people who make mistakes. But it doesn’t mean that I should let that impatience of mine continue!

Having patience means:

•             Letting Hubby learn by himself. {you can build his confidence this way}

•             Not saying “I told you so.”

•             Not telling girlfriends of the unkindnesses of Hubby.

•             Allowing God time to work in Hubby’s life.

•             Praying for Hubby for as long as it takes.

•             Not being bossy & demanding Hubby change.

3.            With silence.

This goes hand in hand with patience. If you’re being a truly patient wife, then you will not be the proverbial nag that so many men abhor.

But being a nag is far from being silent. And learning to be silent when necessary can be sooooo hard for some women. {I don’t discount myself from this group here, because I too have learned that I can’t nag my husband into learning something or changing him.}

There are so many different situations in marriage and learning when and how to say something can be tricky.

Sometimes you must:

•             let Hubby make a mistake so he can learn.

•             keep your tongue and not say “I told you so.”

•             not try to beat into him information that you think is pertinent.

•             not force Hubby to do something he

4.            No tally sheet.

Did you know that you’re supposed to love your husband as if he’s never sinned against you?

“… [love] thinketh no evil.” 1 Corinthians 13:5

The words, “thinketh no evil”, actually means to keep no record of being wronged. If I did this, I would be acting as if Hubby had never done me any wrong at all!

Can you imagine the dynamic in your marriage if you did this? Can you image if:

•             You acted as if Hubby paid you all the attention you think you deserve?

•             You forgot about Hubby’s indiscretions?

Because we are flawed people, there’s no way we could actually accomplish NOT doing wrong. But doing our best to act like Hubby has done no wrong is possible! It may not be easy, but it’s doable!

Keeping no tally sheet means acting as if:

•             Hubby didn’t ignore me.

•             Hubby didn’t disappoint me.

•             Hubby didn’t insult me.

•             Hubby did romance me.

•             Hubby show me attention.

5.            Intentional kindness

Kindness isn’t a feeling; it’s an active attitude or action.

So Hubby could be acting terribly to you, and you’re still supposed to show kindness. Although you may not feel like it is due, you are still supposed to show it!

“Charity…is kind.” 1 Corinthians 13: The word, “kind”, means helpful, useful, benevolent, not with-holding kindness.

It’s hard to show kindness to someone, when we feel they don’t deserve it from us. And it can be hard to show it too! But what a great testimony you will be showing! What a great example of Christ-likeness!

Intentional kindness is:

•             make lunch for Hubby.

•             have his laundry done.

•             make time for Hubby.

•             compliment Hubby.

•             hug & kiss Hubby.

•             be intimate with Hubby.

6.            With untouchiness

Women are known for being touchy. Any little thing can set us off.

•             Hubby comes home too late.

•             Hubby forgets to pick up ____ at the store.

•             Hubby is too sweaty or dirty for cuddling.

•             Hubby spends too much time on video games.

•             Hubby forgets to take out the trash.

•             Hubby isn’t sensitive to my needs.

But love isn’t touchy, cranky, bad-tempered, hypersensitive or irritable.

If Hubby is so worried about hurting my feelings, there’s a problem. If Hubby is constantly worried I’m going to “blow a gasket” becaue of something he says, there’s a problem.

I don’t want Hubby to be afraid that I’m going to get upset when does something little.  I don’t want him to feel “unfree” to be himself around me.

Be intentional about your marriage today! Begin to make marriage better right now!

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