This is true because so many things are demanding for our time. From football matches to other games; from homework and class projects to school plays, church programmes; and on top of the everyday chores and to-do lists at work, people tend to get and feel distant from their spouses – because they are pulled in a million different directions.
For
married people, this is certainly cause problems. This leads to loads of worldly
pressures and anxiety.
When your
holiday and other schedules, which seem to be dominated by the demands of
parenting, stretch our marriages and spiritual lives, it’s time to take a
closer look. Yes, it is a problem; but it’s not one without a solution.
Here
are six things to consider to fine tune your life, for the sake of your
marriage and to have a sound spiritual life and good career.
1. Sometimes, it's okay to say no:
Most
of us extend ourselves beyond capacity. That’s because it can be hard to say
no. Often our hearts are in the right place. We are doing good things. But
sometimes we need to make sure we are saying yes to only the things that are
truly important, and declining on the things that are ultimately
inconsequential.
This
could also mean saying no to your children. You obviously can’t spend your days
visiting every playground in town just because your holidaying kids want to do
so.
2. Prioritize and guard dinner time:
There
should be a time each day in the life of your family that is sacred. For many,
late sports practices or games, hectic work travel schedules and more can keep
this from becoming consistent. But, there’s not a much better way for a family
to grow closer together than to have the consistency of breaking bread together
around the same dinner table.
3. Make Date Night important:
To
remain connected to your spouse, date night has to be a priority. This can be
easier said than done. It doesn't happen near enough in our house. But, if you
are able to get out of the house together, it’s a beautiful time of reconnecting
with each other.
It
enables a couple to see each other as husband and wife, not the roles we play
as dad and mom the rest of the time.
4. Keep Conversations alive:
Any
growing relationship has to be watered, and there’s no better nourishment than
conversation.
Interpersonal
relationships are built by communication, same as marriage. When we lack
communication, it’s hard for us to truly know each other. Spend time daily
conversing with your spouse and your children, and with God.
5. In Marriage, compromise is King:
If the
rule in your house is “it’s my way, or the highway,” then you might need to
hitchhike your way to a better plan.
You
can’t always do what YOU want to do. This means, you have to take your daughter
to her friends’ birthday parties when you would rather be watching football.
For the
wife, it means she occasionally watches football when she’d rather watch a soap
opera. And for the kids, it means they have to go home early from the park so their
baby brother can take a nap.
Compromise
isn’t a bad word; it’s mandatory in a happy home!
6. Don’t be fixated; unplug:
We are
so connected to the world around us, and this easily gets us disconnected from
the home we live in.
We are
constantly checking our phones for new emails, updated news headlines and
sports scores. This certainly doesn’t bring us closer to God and our spouse.
What
we read today on Facebook or Twitter, or see on Instagram or Pinterest, isn’t
going to drastically change our lives for the better. Every
minute you spend playing games online is a minute you could pour into your
spouse or kids.
We
need to regularly force ourselves to disconnect from the electronic devices,
and connect with our families instead.
There’s
no doubt that family problems, busy schedules and everyday concerns can pull
you away from God and your spouse. Don’t let the hectic nature of life –
especially your work schedules - lead you to burnout, both at home and at work!
